Bubbles and Squeak

Tuesday 29th December

I had my first good bit of cheese today. Admittedly I have had bits in salads and in scrambled eggs, but this was a platter of cheese cut wafer thin: blue vein and soft. It came with delicate slices of pear and of apple along with a small jar of quince jam, which makes it sound very Delia Smith.

The result of the beautiful, delicious cheese? Eggy burps.

Not very nice for those on the tube with me travelling back from LACMA.

LACMA is the Los Angeles County Museum of Art, in the way that all museums which want to sound important have to have an acronym as a name. They have some great work and then they have bubbles:

"Michael Jackson and Bubbles" by Jeff Koons, 1998

I am not sure about bubbles. There were was a plaque next to it which explained it to me in artistic terms, but I am still not sure about it.

7 of the things I hate about America

Tuesday 29th December

As promised.

1. Everything is so goddamm spread out
2. They don’t put tax on the menu or the price tag, so it always cost more than you thought it was going to
3. Metro trains do not go most places and the bus system is far too complicated for me to get my head around.
4. You have to tip everyone, for everything, everywhere, every time
5. Working out a 17% or 18% tip is far more complicated than working out 10%, or even 15%. Fortunately there is an app for that.
6. Temperatures are always given in Fahrenheit, so I have no idea if it is going to unbearably hot or excruciatingly cold. Fortunately there is an app for that.
7. International House of Pancakes Restaurants. I’m not sure what makes them “international”, perhaps it is the fact they have maple syrup, or Seville oranges.